We can't desire to be more like Jesus until we know who Jesus is.

         Ignorance kills and a limited understanding can greatly hinder our spiritual lives. Jesus said, if you hold to his teaching you will know the truth and the truth will set you free. The first step to this freedom that Jesus holds out to the world is knowledge. Who is God really and what does he want from me? Too bad the light shines in the darkness and the darkness does not comprehend it. I mean here Jesus is just standing here where everyone can see him but no one see’s him. No one is interested in what he has to say and the worst part is that most of the people who are listening to him don’t really understand what he is saying. That’s right believers lost in the darkness too, to a degree.
         1 Corinthians 13: 12 says, “For now we all see through a glass, darkly.” What this means is that even though we have the truth, sometimes we miss the boat. Like Jesus’ disciples asking Jesus if they could call down fire from heaven to destroy those that oppose them. They were way off base. Or how about the time they ask Jesus to sit at his right hand…way off base. What about when they were asking Jesus to show them the Father. Jesus said, “have you been with me so long and still don't know me?” Darkness affects us all. For a believer, believing the truth is the only way to overcome the darkness, and to believe the truth we have to first actually take the trouble to learn what the truth is. (Reading our Bible) Man can not live my bread alone after all.
         From the time I was 8 till about 24 years old, my understanding of who Jesus was, was that he is the Savior. And that was all I knew. (and that is more than most, Thank God) I knew I needed to be saved, I knew I was a sinner, I knew I needed the blood of Jesus cover my sins before a holy and just God. I knew if they were not covered, I would stand guilty before God, and I would be dammed to a fiery eternity in the torments of hell for ever and ever. (The bible calls such a person a baby in Christ)
         Around the age of 13 /15 church became the most boring place on earth for me. I mean I still enjoyed going to see the girls, playing on the playground, eating the dish to pass meals, and even some of the “special music” but when it came to the churchy stuff, I was bored out of my mind and I can tell you why. I knew “Jesus Saves” (I even had a pin that said so) and I knew that I was saved. There was nothing new to learn. It was like learning basic math. After you get addition, subtraction, multiplication and division down you don’t need to hear it again. I got it, 2+2 is still 4 just like it was last year and the year before that. But imagine if you had to continue going to this perpetual math class once a week for the rest of your life. Yet again, 2+2 still equals 4. The thought of heaven being an endless church service scared me to death; I couldn't wait for church to be over! What was heaven going to be like? Honestly, I really didn't want to go to heaven, I just wanted to go to hell a little less. I suppose heaven was the lesser of two evils?
         Anyhow, my limited understanding of Jesus, who he really is and what he really wanted from me, limited my growth as a follower. I believed in Him, but my understanding was that I just had to trust that he was my savior. That he is risen from the grave and is in heaven and someday I will be there too. This faith, my belief in Jesus, required nothing of me. I mean, of course, there were the commandments but even if you broke one of them, or all of them, you just had to ask Jesus to forgive you. As long as you did not commit the cardinal sin of denying Jesus as lord there wasn't much to worry about. Because of Jesus I had limitless credit with God. I was good to go and go I did. Church was over and life was waiting to be lived. Thank God my parents are making me go there anymore.
         My limited understanding of Jesus eventually led me to living life completely separate and devoid of him. I mean, who's going to keep going to church when it’s that boring, (God will forgive me for not showing up anyhow. Maybe when I strike it rich I’ll send in some money.) In my deepest understanding of who God is I saw no need of him in daily life. God was a Sunday thing and Sunday was about getting saved and I was saved. I never saw God as being interested in having a daily relationship with me. I had no idea that he had a plan for my life to transform me from the inside out. I only saw God as being interested in providing an eternity for me and that was done. So, little by little I drifted farther and farther from God, till the day came that I realized God was in none of my thoughts. In fact, the day I came back to God I prayed, God if you're real, I have to know. If you are God, what is the point of life?